Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Why would I save my refund? I'm American!

I found out yesterday just how much my tax refund is going to be and since I’m in school it is much bigger than what I have received in the past. Now the question is what do I spend all this money on?! I don’t want to hear all you fuddy duddies (Chuckles) and your stoopid suggestion of, “Why not save it so you can pay off more of your school loans later?” Pooh on you is what I say!

My first thought was to spend it all on almonds. I know I’m weird – no need to inform me in the comments section. The thing is I’m obsessed with these almonds:

I luurrvvee them and I’ve convinced myself that they’re healthy so I can eat them all freakin’ day long. I’m sure that they’re only healthy if I eat a few and not all of them in one day, but I find that life is more enjoyable when I live in denial. So option one is to start a stockpile of roasted almonds.

Option two is the more boring option where I go on a crazy shopping spree. The first order of business would be a watch. I lost my last one and my phone is always dead so I never know what time it is, which probably explains why I’m late to everything. Actually, I’m probably late to everything because I’m like my dad and am convinced that it only takes me twenty minutes to get wherever I’m going and in Seattle that kind of logic implies that I am certifiably crazy. But maybe if I get a watch I’ll be more aware of the fact that even though I think it only took me twenty minutes it, in fact, took over an hour. I am thinking I want this watch:

I kid. I kid. That’s ugly. I was thinking something more along the lines of this:

Or I could get a pair of yellow shoes…I have been dying for a pair for ages.

Or I could just spend it all on porn. The possibilities are endless! What would you buy right now if you could buy anything with no regards to cost?


dmb5_libra said...

i think i would buy a house and furnish it....that or world peace.

also, smoked almonds are the bomb!!

Gretchen said...

Hmmm...I'd buy a Mac and then I'd make a dent in my amazon wishlist. And I can totally vouch for the amazing-ness of those almonds!

The Dutchess of Kickball said...

Well, first of all I am loving the shape of heals that are in style right now.

But I plan on actually putting my refund towards debt, I know lame. But if for some magical reason I get a refund that is like 100 times more than I am expecting and I can pay off my debt and have some left over, I would totally buy a Keurig coffee maker!

Anonymous said...

The shoes are hot... and the almonds are an option too...

personally I wouldn't spend it on porn... i mean you can get the stuff for free online...

PunkyBean said...

Again, we relate! I too am always late, because I think it only gets twenty minutes to get somewhere! In the city that's sort of possible, but out in the burbs - not so much! Awesome!

I like the shoes and the watch, but am hungry, so I'm thinking almonds!

Rachie said...

I'd say half in savings and half on porn. Smart.

Andy said...

Well, the watch and the shoes would be enjoyed by you and the rest of the world.

But the almonds and the porn? JUST for you.

I think the selfish choice is pretty obvious.

Jay said...

I think that with all those accessories (almonds included), there's practically enough to devise a loose premise for your OWN porno.

rs27 said...

Buy a monkey.

It must be done.

Jane said...

I think I'd take a vacation. It's been three years since I had a real vacation. I think that's too long!

Dingo said...

Pay off debt. Go on vacation. Fall in love with the out of the way, no civilization for miles vacation spot, build a house, and spend the rest of the money installing fiber optics or whatever I need so that I can have internet and cable TV.

Megkathleen said...

dmb5_libra - A few new chairs did cross my mind, but that would involve long discussions with the boyfriend and I don't want any hassle.

Gretchen - Nice! A new computer would always be welcome.

The Dutchess of Kickball - I know I should totally follow your example. I probably will somewhat, but I want at least one little treat for myself.

Liam - Shoes it is!

Punkybean - I've decided we'd be bff if you lived nearby.

Rachie - Genius!

Andy - I do enjoy being selfish.

Jay - You are a genius. Can I hire you as my life planner?

rs27 - Oh, didn't I say? I'm definitely buying a monkey. I'd be crazy not too.

Jane - I actually am going to buy plane tickets to Boston! I can't wait.

Dingo - Can I come with?

Amy said...

A car... So i can actually get to places in this big city. I know I can walk places and thats better for the environment, and I do walk... a LOT, but a car would just give me more opportunities (like driving home more often.. its a 2.5 hr drive)

Maxie said...

chicago meetup in june?

i vote yes.

Anonymous said...

Hmm...all Very good ideas! I think I'd just wander around Target until it was all spent. Which would probably take all of uhhhh 20 minutes?
That watch is way cute :) whether it helps with late-ness or not.

Bayjb said...

Personally, I used the tax refund last year for a Mac, but from your list, i say blow it on almonds and porn.

alexa - cleveland's a plum said...

i want a yacht!!

but in reality i'll probably use my refund to buy a mac and fund my NYC trip in march. (it's a nice sized return)

stoogepie said...

I would buy happy meals for all the starving children of the world, houses for all the homeless people, and medicine for all the world's sick. Then I would buy all the guns in the world and throw them in a huge incinerator while everyone on the planet gathered outside and sang, "We are the world." In tune.

Do we move on to the talent portion of the pageant now?

Oh, wait. No, no, I wouldn't do any of that. I would buy Honolulu and all of its people, ship all the ugly people off to Guantanamo, and have the beautiful people serve me day and night for the rest of their lives. And I would buy a webcam so everyone could watch me have sex with my minions while I ate bucket after bucket of roasted almonds. Cake would also be involved.

Kristen said...

Stoogepie is full of shit. That's how he lives already.

Anyway, I would buy a new car, a refrigerator, and a cleaning lady.

You can get porn for free on the Internets.

Matt said...

I think almonds is probably your best pick out of those options.

I plan to spend mine on hookers and blow.

dont judge.

Megkathleen said...

Amy - I can't imagine life without my car. I hope you get a big enough refund!

Maxie - I WISH! I already had a trip to Boston planned which coincided with the original meetup and then they had to change it. So sad.

Heatherdc - I could easily do that in Banana Republic. I have zero control over myself in that store.

Bayjb - Almonds seems to be winning out.

Alexa - Impressive! I wish I was going to NYC. I can't complain too much though.

Stoogepie - Can I join you on the island? I'll bring chocolate cake!

Kristen - I didn't even think of a cleaning lady, I definitely need one.

Matt - Judge? Are you kidding me? I'm jealous that I forgot to add blow to my list.

Anonymous said...

Chair and a half.

I want one SO bad.

stealthnerd said...

I'm beyond geeky but I want this really cool bookcase that like, expands as you go and it's all geometric and neat and wow...I'm just gonna stop there.

Also, @ Dutchess-DO NOT GET THE KEURIG!!! We have one at work and I haaaaate it!

gina said...

I've been lusting to get a pair of yellow shoes since I saw a pair of patent yellow pumps a year ago fall. Go with yellow shoes!!

Elizabeth said...

I would have a hard time choosing, but I am leaning toward a 10 year vacation with the freedom to go anywhere and do anything, courtesy of my private Concord plane that they would put back into circulation just for me. Then...I would figure out which charities make the biggest impact and just overload them with cash.

This might seem weird--but I kind of want bright blue pumps. I'm pretty sure I couldn't pull that one off, unfortunately!

kez said...

Oh my goodness. I would be all responsible and buy my $360 university text books.
I would then buy glasses that I can actually see out of.
I had to stop that plan when the hubby lost his job.
I would also go clothes shopping and shoe shopping and I would probably even sell my car and buy a slightly better one with less mileage as I've totally overdone it with travelling to and from my job!

Anonymous said...

first - almonds are from the heavens!

second - i guess i would buy Maggy London. that way she could be my personal designer... i would like that

ÄsK AliCë said...

My vote is for shoes...and almonds!

I would buy myself a new bed, my mattress is getting uncomfortably old!