As the title not so cleverly points out things are not going so well for me. Specifically in the football arena. I’ve already pointed out that my fantasy football quarterback was Tom Brady and we all know what happened there. Then this weekend I unwittingly left a couple players on my roster who were Houston players – Damn Hurricane Ike! I blame my suckiness all on Ike NOT on my laziness, which caused me to not update my team. It’s Ike’s fault I tell you. Or Spencer’s. In fact, let’s go with Spencer because I hate him with the passion of a thousand suns and the fug girls are right when they say, “Blame Spencer.”
Secondly, my beloved Washington State Cougars are embarrassing themselves. Last week they lost to California to the tune of 66 – 3. Not pretty. I can’t even bring myself to watch, which has caused some people to accuse me of not being a true Coug to which I reply, “SHUT YOUR MOUTH! Do you want me to sing the fight song at the top of my lungs right now?! Do you?! Because I will. Don’t doubt that. And, yes, that is a threat. Nobody wants to hear me sing.”
Thirdly, there are the Seahawks. We got our asses handed to us last week, but this week I blame our loss to the 49er’s on stupid NFL rules. I HATE the way NFL overtime works – it basically all comes down to luck of the draw. If they had called heads I am sure we would have won. Obviously somebody has it out for me and by somebody I mean GOD. So God, please, I really need at least one of my teams to do well. Is that asking too much of you?! Is it?! Of course not. While you’re at it I think I’m going to buy a lottery ticket later so if you could email me the winning numbers I would reaallllyyy appreciate it.
On a completely unrelated note here is my poll for today: Since today is my big sister’s birthday should I A. take her out to dinner and a movie (I was thinking the dollar menu at Mickey D’s and Tyler Perry’s new flick), B. take her shopping at H&M and be loud and obnoxious and force her to try on the most ridiculous outfits I can find, or C. offer to babysit her two little boys and teach the oldest to say naughty things (feel free to suggest naughty sayings that would be funny to hear a three year old boy say).