I always joke that I have a slightly obsessive compulsive personality. I don’t mean that I have to check 7 times if I turned the oven off or that I compulsively wash my hands, but that I am a complete slave to my routine. Sometimes I think that my routine is all that is keeping me sane. I can be so engrossed in my routine that it interferes with my life. For example, around midterms and finals I will get super stressed about not having enough time to study or write papers, but instead of asking for help from Chuckles in doing my laundry or grocery shopping or cooking dinner I will insist on doing it all myself. Because how could I possibly get through a Friday morning without going to the grocery store? Or you can’t seriously think I would let somebody else touch my dirty clothes? The thought alone makes me start hyperventilating.
It’s not just my routine, but I always need my CD’s and shoes to be arranged in a certain order and if somebody even thinks about changing it I will Flip. The Fuck. Out. Anyway, I wasn’t planning on boring you with ALL of my neuroses today…The fact is that my routine has been thrown into a complete tailspin this past week and it is ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT. While writing about Enron the only thing going through my mind is “I don’t know what we’re doing for dinner tomorrow night” and next thing you know I’ve written that exact sentence down right in the middle of a paragraph about auditing legislation. It takes me approximately a minute to get out of my chair because I’m concentrating on the fact that I can’t, at the moment, do laundry at my house.
The reason for all the changes is GOOD, but I can’t seem to get past the change itself. We are having our kitchen and utility room floor retiled and getting a new stove and Chuckles is repainting those rooms. Good things right?! Especially the stove because I have been known to complain about our lack of a vent.
My complete reliance on routine could quite possibly be the most annoying thing about me. I definitely hate that I can be so inflexible about how things have to be done. I guess I hope that by writing this out I can see how utterly silly I’m being. Does anybody else rely on their daily routines to a fault and, if not, how do you live?!