Friday, January 30, 2009

How I Got My Kitchen Aid Mixer

I have to say my mom is pretty cool and I’m not just saying that because I am pretty much an exact replication of my mom. I say it because she makes horrible bets and as a result I’ve gotten a lot of free stuff.

I’m not the only she makes bets with; in fact I’m pretty sure that it is her favorite pastime. For example, when I was away at college and my younger brother was still at home for some unknown reason they got into a discussion about how many times I had braces growing up: little bro said twice and my mom said, “Only once, are you kidding me?! I think I would remember shelling out that kind of dough!” Of course, a bet had to be made as to who was right and I was promptly called and asked the question. No “How are you?” “How’s college treating you?” Just, “How many times did you have braces?” Not even a goodbye. Anyway, the answer was twice. Yes, I had terrible terrible teeth. So my brother got new bedding while my mom went to the orthodontist and demanded that after all the money they’ve received from our family there should at least be a chair in the lobby dedicated to our family.

Two years ago I went on vacation with her to the Oregon coast and did not buy one thing for myself. Every game of cribbage or cards played was with the caveat that loser pays for breakfast or loser pays for coffee etc. etc. Like I said I received a LOT of free meals.

But by far the best bet I made was, alas, my last because my dad finally told her she had to stop because he was tired of buying all this free stuff for me…that and I almost had her hooked for a free computer twenty minutes later and he just couldn’t let that happen.

It occurred right after I moved into my Green Lake apartment and was whining constantly about how I didn’t have a kitchen aid mixer. I mean, how was I supposed to bake cookies?! How does one LIVE without a kitchen aid mixer?! My live was incomplete without one! I couldn’t sleep at night!

So, anyway, one day my parents, big sis, and nephew joined me on a walk around the lake and lunch at a local restaurant. At lunch my mom ordered calamari and when it came my sister, mom, and I dug into the rings but only my dad would eat the squid. I, by far, was the most grossed out by the squid with their little heads and would look at my dad in pure disgust every time he nonchalantly popped one in his mouth. My mom, of course, was curious as to what my price would be - as in just how much would it take to get me to eat one of those things. The perfect situation for a bet. At first it was hypothetical with my mom simply asking, “If you were to get a free yellow kitchen aid mixer would you eat the calamari?” Of course, I replied saying there was no way for me to know without the offer actually being on the table and, well, her curiosity got the better of her and a concrete offer was made. It did take me a good forty-five minutes to grow a pair and eat the damn squid and we had to tell the waitress multiple times do NOT take the plate away. I really have my sister to thank for finally saying to me, “Just eat it for the love of all things holy! It’s a free kitchen aid mixer! I can’t even look at you right now. You disgust me.” It was just the push I needed. A week later my parents showed up at my apartment with a kitchen aid mixer wrapped in squid recipes.

17 comments:

notsojenny said...

i like to make bets with M, but they're usually for a buck or a task. my future brother in law has this habit too but he's about the big bucks... he's got a serious tab with me. his first bet ever to me was that i couldn't eat the entire steak that was put on my plate. M laughed because he knows you never bet against me and red meat.
... i can't WAIT to get my kitchenaide mixer. every time we discuss eloping i bring this up, this is the main reason we're having an actual wedding.

Elizabeth said...

Haha--I don't think I could live without my kitchen aid! But squid? Ick!

Good one on your mom!

Gretchen said...

This was a great story. I'd eat a bucketful of calimari if it meant I got a free kitchenaid.

rs27 said...

I don't need a kitchen aid mixer. Thats what women are for. Wait, I don't know women.

Damn.

Matt said...

You need to start thinking bigger.

Start betting cars or cd accounts.

stealthnerd said...

I had the same panicked feeling when I moved into my apartment and realized that I couldn't make cookies w/o my mixer.

Jay said...

Much like my wife, you are a complete appliance whore.

S. said...

People don't even bet me anymore because I "always win". I don't argue. Actually, I do argue and then I win by ending it with "I bet you" and BAM! I win.

PunkyBean said...

That is so fun! I love your mom! Is she looking to adopt?

Anonymous said...

I wish I had Kitchen aide, it would make my life so much easier!

Also, I saw your blog was designed by delicious.. anyway, i believe someone stole your header and repurposed it (unless its you).

http://www.bloggerboutique.com/

Kez said...

Hahaha Score!

heatherdc said...

Kitchen aide?! Those things are amazing. We have one at home but barely ever use it because none of us really know how. But it looks nice.
:)

Rachie said...

Kitchen Aid mixer? On a bet? No fair!

Andy said...

Hahahahaha... That's why I only bet free ice creams.

Bayjb said...

You are a betting prize goddess. Teach me. Your mom cracks me up.

Chris said...

What a profitable mealtime conversation! It sure beats the one I frequently have with my 73 year old Dad who always seems to think the waitress is hitting on him.

Jamie said...

I don't know if would have been able to do it. Squid grosses me out!